LONG POST.

Someone once told me that I’m no longer the person I used to be. He’s like “Hey you used to be blahblahblah. What happened ?” I’d like to admit, my mind kinda like has shadows that drag me in and made me took the wrong turns. It took me a while to realize it actually. But still, I don’t blame myself for behaving like one. You know how it feels surrounded by the people that you see them how they are with you, but you don’t see them when they turn around. Blame is actually on them, seriously. They’re giving me shits, why in the hell do I still need to show and give them respect ?

It makes me realize not to rely on anyone and expect the worst in people. Don’t easily be nice to others whom you don’t know that well. You know, too much of a good thing is never good because they’ll soon betray you by the chances they have.

I know I’m not the nicest person in the world. You don’t have to tell me. But at least I’m not hiding who I really am, like you. From the bullshit and the lies, I can finally say you’re just another fake bitch in disguise. I know in your posts, you’re some kind of giving me hint, hoping for me to reply. But then, you’ll get all mad once I replied. Why is it so ? You asked for it, didn’t you ? I guess, you’re weak at accepting harsh words from others ey ? If really you’re trying to pick a fight, make it a good one, sweetheart.

Nah, I don’t mind or have a problem with swallowing my ego. But I’ll only do it to a certain point, obviously. I’m sorry for all the things that I’ve said. I wish I could take it all back because it came from a smelly and ignorant place in me, and spoke with a voice that was all rage and envy. And if you still want to continue posting those kind of post, just go on but you don’t have to wait for my reply because just so you know I’m sooooo out from your so-high-school-drama :)

For God sake, I’m tired of doing all that. I’m not hoping for you to stop posting all those posts. Just that, I pity you sometimes. Wanna know why ? Because those words that you’re trying so hard throwing at me you don’t know how exactly they reflect back on you. I don’t know what makes me doing this or maybe I do know. I honestly think our problems are actually solvable. Hmph in actual fact, we’re in need for change. Not to assume things as much and jump to conclusion that fast. And sorry to whom it may concern. I bring it in a mature manner, think I’ve said enough.

“I can’t judge any of you. I have no malice against you and no ribbons for you. But I think that it is high time that you all start looking at yourselves, and judging the lie that you live in.”

“Nobody wants to admit this, but bad things will keep on happening. Maybe that’s because it’s all a chain, and a long time ago someone did the first bad thing, and that led someone else to do another bad thing, and so on. You know, like that game where you whisper a sentence into someones’ ear, and that person whispers it to someone else, and it all comes out wrong in the end. But then again, maybe bad things happen because it’s the only way we can keep remembering what good is supposed to look like.”